Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about opinions, assumptions, biases and why it can be so dang difficult to seriously consider a different point of view (never mind actually changing one’s mind about something).
One quick scroll through my Facebook newsfeed gives me a pretty clear picture of how people “dig their heels in” to protect their ideas and opinions on a matter. And, how NO amount of facts or data can change someone’s mind IF they aren’t willing to consider it. (I suspect a few hot topics come to mind?)
Ugh. I find it discouraging and disheartening.
I did some quick reading on the topic and discovered that, “facts by themselves are meaningless. They are ones and zeroes to your mental computer, raw blank data that only take on meaning when run through the software of your feelings.” Yep, even facts and rational arguments get filtered through our perceptions. (And I must say, some people’s filters could use a good cleaning. But that’s just my opinion. 😉 )
“I would rather have a mind opened by wonder than one that is closed by belief.” Gerry Spence
Amen. So how do I do that?
Well, I think it’s important to acknowledge that we run EVERYTHING through our filters and biases…ALL THE TIME! We can’t change something unless we are aware of it. And, our filters actually change the message we are hearing! (This is such an important thing to learn for effective communication in relationships.)
And I also think it’s important to notice our posture.
Is my back turned toward an idea? Are my arms crossed?
Am I actually listening to understand or am I only seeking to defend my case?
It’s been over a decade since I read the book, “7 Habits of Highly Effective People”.
But one piece of wisdom rings in my mind more than any other.
Seek first to understand and then to be understood.
Just imagine what could happen if we did.
Quote from: Why Changing Somebody’s Mind, or Yours, Is Hard to Do by David Ropeik on psychologytoday.com
I made a first-hand discovery yesterday – assumptions cause blindness.
Wendy 